Tuesday, 22 February 2011

Day 06.

30 interesting facts about yourself.

This'll be fun...

  1. My Chinese year is the year of the dragon.
  2. I've broken four bones in my body.
  3. I've completed several 'Football Manager' games, Including the 2007 Japanese edition.
  4. I share the same birthday as my fiance.
  5. We were also born in the same hospital.
  6. We're probably twins
  7. I'm often mistaken for Woody Harrelson. And Nicolas Anelka.
  8. I used to be a size eleven foot. They shrunk. Seriously.
  9. My retarded sister just corrected me on how to spell 'shrunk'
  10. My star sign is 'Taurus'.
  11. I can bench 280 Pounds.
  12. I'm already bored thinking of things to write.
  13. The only thing on tele I ever cried watching, was Rocky. I was about ten. And I loved Micky.
  14. We have five different species of animal in the house.
  15. Not including the family gorilla, Michelle.
  16. I always wanted to be a footballer as a kid.
  17. Now I just want to have a minimum wage.
  18. Man, I'm a waste man.
  19. I'm the half son of the infamous James Shearman.
  20. I'm also the half brother of the legendary Roycie.
  21. I can count the amount of hairs on my chest.
  22. I once spent over £200 on booze, on a single night out.
  23. My favourite alcoholic drink is Vodka.
  24. I'm actually a great dancer, though no-one else agrees.
  25. I watched two whole films in a week once.
  26. Half of this blog is a lie or joke.
  27. I once made a hat. Out of bricks.
  28. I still own my first pair of converse.
  29. I should've done this drunk.
  30. I chopped off the end of my left pinky in a gate.

Monday, 21 February 2011

Day 05.

A day you thought about ending your own life.

I love how whoever wrote this list assumed that you had in fact thought about taking your own life. Don't get me wrong, we've all had our downs in life but why just give everything up? None of my life targets have been accomplished. I'm jobless. I've a lot to not be happy with myself but you aren't gonna catch me going all Owen Wilsonon your ass.

It's surprising how much this list makes you think about aspects in your life..

It could be that i'm just too stubborn. For me, Doing yourself in would be giving up. Losing. And anyone who knows me knows I hate losing. Call me harsh but I feel that people who do this shit are weak in character,I know some people are in real shit-street situaions but why take away your own right of life? I'd imagine no matter what situation you're in, your situation is better than being dead. It's (for me) A form of running away from your problems.

Besides, it's not just the people who take their own lives that are effected. FAMILY, MAN! And how would your friends feel that you'd rather top yourself than have to see their ugly faces? I know my boys would be heartbroken. My family would probably just be fighting over who gets my room and possessions.

Look, if you're gonna take your own life, don't be an inconsiderate prick and throw yourself on a railway line. Some of us work rather than feel sorry for ourselves.


Saturday, 19 February 2011

Day 03.

Your views on drugs & alcohol.

My views on the drugs & alcohol are pretty straight forward. Just don't do it to excess.


Having a couple here and there, and the occasional party is great. After one or two drinks you start feeling more sociable, a few more and you bust the dance moves...

But it's when you drink so much you lose basic bodily functions such as walking straight and talking that you know it's gone too far. There's not many more embarrassing situations then when your helplessly wrapped around a toilet in a puddle of your own spew and tears. With everyone pointing at you. Laughing. The worst is still yet to come with the hangover.. I think it's tragic when you see people that rely on the stuff. People lowering their quality of life because they waste all of their time and money on the bottle...

Jack Sparling. 2013.


Ever since watching Requiem for a dream, my views on drugs have hardened a little bit. I still think that the odd joint or line here and there is alright. Experiment while you're young.

"Cocaine is hell of a drug"
You'll know when you've gone too far with drugs. You'll be borrowing money to pay for the stuff, Getting into trouble with authorities, and generally ruining your life & career. You'll wake up one day and you're practically Charlie Sheen.

Wasted potential.

Just take it easy, kids.

Friday, 18 February 2011

Day 02.

Where you'd like to be in ten years.

When I think about myself in ten years time, only one image really comes to mind...

Any balding mans hope.

I guess when you ask yourself the question of where you'd like to be in ten years time, you probably look at the most important parts of your life...


Not to be laying in a bed with Leprosy or something would be a pretty obvious one. But I'd like to at least be reasonably fit and still have all of my senses, teeth and good looks. Also, as long as I don't become as fat as some Sparlings I know I'll be happy.


A lot of people would say that their career is the arguably most important aspect of their lives. For me it's hard to say. I'm still not entirely sure what I want to do in my career. I suppose working in the construction industry though, the best I could look forward to is running a firm...


Love/Social life.

In ten years time my lover would have grown sick of my drinking problems and requests for a 'carradine'. She'd be replaced with Michelle Rodriguez. I'd spend all of my spare time in bars like some sort of socialite.

I can see myself reading this article in ten years time. From a jail cell where I've got the computer, Xbox and flat screen tele I could never afford in the outside world.

Thursday, 17 February 2011

Day 01.

Your current relationship, if single discuss how life is.

Engaged, Almost three years now. I know what you're thinking...

 31/12/2010  23:57

But the pros of being with someone this long outweigh the con's. Pros such as...

Having someone there for you.

All you guys know how good it is to be able to come home from a hard days work, and have emotional talks with your partner about stuff like your workmates bullying you because your mum still makes your packed lunch. Laying this shit out to your friends isn't gonna keep them around for long.


I'm a man, sex has to be said. In all of my times being single, I've never been the type of man with enough confidence to even talk to girls, let alone take them home. Besides, your partner tends to understand those 'problems' you sometimes have.


There's things you just can't do with friends, Like have brunch, Go to romantic Italian restaurants, or get them to scream "please! stop!" when you have sex with them. It's just weird.

Overall I feel relationships are only as good as what you put in. It's also fortunate for me I've settled with someone before I started losing my hair and developing psychological problems.


An introduction: 30 day challenge.

So, I've been thinkin' about doing a blog for some time. Days now. I thought this here 30 day challenge would be a pretty easy way to break myself in;

So, by day 30 I reckon it's a pretty fair target to expect around 8,000 views a week. Day 15 will be interesting, finding out what a Tumblr is.